Owning Your Authenticity: Learning to Be Your Most Genuine Self

Why is it so hard for us to be unapologetically who we are on a consistent basis? Sure, in comfortable situations we usually show our truest colors, but what is holding us back from doing so in plain sight? In front of people who don’t know us? The most magical parts of our souls are the boldest colors streaked across the messy, vibrant canvas that we call life. Yes, that’s a courageous statement to make, but who we are at the core makes us rare. Each of us is navigating different life paths, therefore, we are built with different traits that allow us to transform into who we were always meant to be. Our differences are the most beautiful facets of our lives. Stop conforming to appease. Stop changing your stance, voice, body language, look, mentality or feelings because you want to fit into the majority. If you refuse to be in your truest form, at all times, you are losing out on moments of authenticity that you can never get back from the swirling bits of time that make up your life.

Societal standards are bogus.

Whatever lies you have floating around your head, that have been deeply embedded there by society, should be thrown away now. Seriously, stop trying to live up to standards that don’t make sense to actual life. If you haven’t noticed, those “standards” change as often as you change your underwear and literally no one can keep up if they tried. Stop believing everything you read or see. The materials you consume play a huge role in the feelings you create about your own life. Create your life standards based on what brings you joy and fulfillment. Forget about all the white noise of society and fulfill your soul purpose. Stop scrolling through feeds that piss you off or bring you down. Start diving headfirst into things that light your soul on fire.

Trying to please people who don’t matter is a waste of time.

Stop doing it. I cannot say this enough. I am speaking to you and my 22-year-old self with this one. There are so many people that you are going to meet, talk to, have some level of a relationship with that you don’t actually care about because of factors that don’t work in your world. Let’s be honest here. People pleasing is not the way to win. Every person you meet serves a purpose in your life journey, but not all of them will hold a significant place in your story. The anchored relationships in your life will stick around. They will support you. They will be there for you when your boat capsizes and the sea swells and consumes you. They are the people who matter. Stop trying to please people who hold no relevant weight in your life. Start working on pleasing yourself by choosing you first. When you are able to understand and practice this, I promise that your inner peace will increase immensely, because, ultimately, you’re in control of that, right? Spoiler alert, the answer is YES. Always, yes.

Doing things that you don’t want to do is unhealthy for your happiness.

How often do you find yourself going through the motions? Doing things, you feel like you need to without understanding how it plays into your soul purpose. Daily? Weekly? Hourly even? No matter how often, you need to stop. Yes, S-T-O-P. I’m not kidding. Don’t go to that event you were invited to if it shatters your mental health. Don’t say “yes” to people when you would rather scream, “no!” Stop allowing others to dictate what will make you happy. Don’t settle into a job that minimizes your worth and pushes you to question your actual purpose. Live where you are happy. Surround yourself with people who provide meaningful and supportive relationships. Stop quieting your inner voice to appease people who don’t understand your journey (most times they don’t want to!). Speak up and speak out for things that matter to your heart and soul. Believe in yourself in every single waking moment. When things feel heavy, shift the weight of your conscious to find peace.

Since this is about authenticity, I want you to understand that implementing all of these aforementioned ideas takes time and effort. It’s hard to put yourself consistently first in the midst of all the chaos around us. It’s gut wrenching to be honest about what you want and deserve in difficult situations. I have been a work in progress since as long as I can remember. I struggle to find my footing sometimes; the truth is that everyone does. Until you believe with all of your heart, in yourself and your abilities, the vision can be a bit fuzzy. Once you reach a level of clarity about who you are and what gives your soul fulfillment you walk through life with a level of peace that can only be obtained through self-growth. Things that used to be important to you have fallen to the ground as you rise to serve your purpose in this world. If you’ve been looking for a sign to level up and clear your conscious, this is it.

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©2021 by Cat Frias